No Such Thing as You Lost it All
by perfectromanceinmymind
Summary: Sam and Mercedes share a quiet moment in the chaos of Sugar's party. Takes place immediately following the end of episode 3-13 "Heart"


Mercedes took a deep breath of cool fresh air as she stepped out of the 'Sugar Shack' and walked a little ways down the sidewalk in front of Breadstix, until she reached one of the benches outside the restaurant. Sitting down, she crossed her arms over her chest and shivered just slightly. It had been an unseasonably warm winter, so it really wasn't that cold outside, especially after being crammed into the restaurant with all the other people at the party, plus dancing around and singing, but it was chilly and she did only have short sleeves on her little jacket. She'd just had to get away.

Mercedes sighed as she reflected on the last ten minutes or so. Singing. With Sam. A sweet romantic love song.

It had sucked.

Well, not the song or the performance. Mercedes thought they'd all sounded quite nice together, her and Sam and Quinn and Joe, if she did say so herself, and Santana had seemed to indicate that she felt she got her money's worth, so that was all fine and good.

But singing something like that? With the guy whose heart she'd just broken? Not to mention her own broken heart. Mercedes had thought that nothing sucked more than being single on Valentine's Day, but this? _Definitely_ worse.

She glanced up as the front door of the restaurant opened and party sounds slipped out into the night. When she'd come outside, a bunch of the guys were performing 98 Degrees' 'Because of You,' but now she recognized Rachel belting out some romantic ballad or another.

Then Mercedes realized who had walked outside and she swallowed a groan. Sam. Of course it was. Was he following her or something?

He wasn't looking in her direction and so she watched him for a few seconds, marveling at how he was looking as fine as always, and she wondered briefly if that would _always_ be the first thought she had when she saw him. She wished there was a way she could disappear before he saw her, but there was no hope of that, so she figured she might as well try to gain the upper hand in the conversation.

"What are you doing out here?"

He turned, startled by her voice and surprise flashed across his face. "What are you doing?" he countered.

Mercedes had a brief flash of guilt about her self-centered assumption that he was outside because of her and shook her head. "I'm sorry, that sounded really obnoxious. I just – needed to get away from all the – noise and stuff."

Sam nodded. "Yeah, me too," he mumbled, not really looking at her.

"I thought you were boy-banding it up with the rest of the guys," Mercedes teased, a little tentatively, and was relieved when he actually cracked a smile.

"I was, but Rachel demanded a turn when we got done," Sam shrugged. "And, I, uh – I guess I just wasn't really in the mood for one of her sappy love songs."

Mercedes grimaced. "Yeah. Sugar's rules though – no sad songs. Only happy, positive love songs!" she said in a fair imitation of Sugar's voice and Sam smiled again.

"Hey, impressions are my territory," he mock-reprimanded her. "Don't be stealing my shtick!"

Mercedes smiled and Sam's expression turned somber again. "Anyway," he said, "Sugar also said that no one was allowed without a date and like, half the glee club broke that rule."

Mercedes acknowledged that statement with a nod and a brief chuckle. "Yeah, I guess so."

Sam had walked over to the bench by this point and he inclined his head towards it, silently asking permission to sit down. Mercedes nodded and he sat down beside her, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees and his chin in his hands.

"Besides, some of the world's best love songs are the sad ones." He took a deep breath before continuing to speak, so softly she could barely hear him. "Like the one you sang the other day. It was beautiful." He stared straight ahead, knowing if he looked at her, it was all over, he'd be bawling again, but he couldn't help it – he had to let her know how amazing she was. He understood her need to figure herself out and he respected that – but he just couldn't give up on her.

Mercedes nodded, not quite trusting herself to speak.

"Thank you," she finally said, in just as quiet a voice as his.

They sat there in awkward silence for a few moments before Sam spoke again. "Sorry," he said. "We were actually having a conversation for a few minutes – I didn't mean to make things weird."

Mercedes shook her head. "It's not weird, it's just –" Her voice trailed off before she went on to say, "I don't know what it is. But I don't want to not be friends with you."

Sam nodded. "I know. I don't want that either – but I don't want to just be your friend."

Mercedes closed her eyes, trying to collect herself. She'd have thought she'd be used to these – declarations – from him by now, but they still catch her by surprise, how much he likes her, wants her, even.

Finally, she took a deep breath, and admitted, "I might not want to be just friends either. I just – I need some time to think, okay?"

Sam nodded again. "I know. I get that. Take all the time you need."

"Thank you," she said softly.

She shivered slightly then and he looked at her, concerned. "It's kinda cold out here. You ready to go back in?"

She nodded and they stood up to walk back towards the restaurant.

"Sounds like Rachel's sappy ballad is finished, but she's singing something else now," Sam said as they got closer to the door and could hear the music clearly again.

Mercedes nodded, listening for a second before recognizing the song. "It's her and Finn. They're singing their mash-up of 'Borderline' and 'Open Your Heart.' From Madonna week?" she added after seeing Sam's confused look.

"Madonna week?" Sam questioned and then Mercedes remembered.

"Oh, that's right, you weren't here yet," Mercedes explained. "We did a Madonna week the first year of glee club." She smiled shyly, glancing over at him. "Sorry, I forget you missed that first year. It just – seems like you've always been here."

Sam couldn't help grinning big at those words – at the idea that she couldn't quite remember a time when he wasn't around.

"I know what you mean," he replied, holding the door open for her to walk inside in front of him.

She turned to look at him before walking through the door. "For whatever it's worth – however things end up - I'm glad you got here."

Sam grinned again. "Yeah. Me too," he replied. "Me too."

**Title comes from the song "Even Angels Fall" by Jessica Riddle. Hope you like this - please let me know! Thanks!**


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